A Break Up Is A Series Of Events-Actions-Moments-Words...

Break ups do not happen overnight. I think the act of breaking up with someone happens over a 
series of event, moments, actions or exchanged words... No one just breaks up to break up unless there is an issue of immaturity. Whatever the reasons or causes the act of breaking up should never be a surprise.

Endings are sad but when they are mean't to happen they are inevitable. There is a saying in my country that you cannot decorate a pig it will still get dirty. I don't mean that anyone is a pig in this instance haha I just mean that if something has a natural tendency towards being a certain way no matter how much you work to make it not so, it will always revert back to its nature. So when you realize that there are deal breakers in a relationship and you voice them and nothing happens or changes then you know in your gut that an ending is inevitable. If you or your partner are not willing to change/compromise then you are better of on your separate ways.

I don't know about you but I prefer a clean and clear cut exit especially when you separate on good terms. If you linger then you cannot truly move on. I do not like the culture of people interacting with their exes on a frequent basis or even on a friendly basis unless there is something tying them together like having children and even then the interaction should be limited to the children's welfare. This is because it always interferes with the present and it is indeed a disservice to the current relationship. The reason why a thing is an ex is because it is not in the present. It is null and void. It's existence has seized. Trust me flirting with the past jeopardizes your present and future.

In the book of Mark 2:21-22 there are two very cool verses that relate to mixing the old with new and they are: 

"21 No one sews a piece of unshrunk cloth on an old garment. If he does, the patch tears away from it, the new from the old, and a worse tear is made.  22 And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the wine will burst the skins—and the wine is destroyed, and so are the skins. But new wine is for fresh wineskins.”

I won't elaborate further. If you have followed my blog over the past couple of months then you know that I love my bible so when verses like this pop up in my current reading plan in a season such as this I pay attention. So out with the old and in with the new haha well this single lady is ready to enjoy some 'free' time. By no means do I mean jumping back into the dating pool no, I think I need an "Eat, Pray and Love" type of season to devote to myself and hence the free time. Relationships require work and an investment of time and effort. So being single frees up some of that stuff.

A few years ago a friend sent me a message and she asked, "why do we go to the world for consultation instead of going to our knees in prayer?" I have never forgotten this question.

So I have constantly asked God to be present and alive in every aspect of my life. Without going into too much detail when I wrote here about knowing when you are with the one and not knowing or knowing that you are not with the one is critical. A person must always have a sense of awareness about themselves and the people around them. Always assess and make objective decisions. It is your life.

If something is not working exit from it with as much grace as you can master and recognize that a new season is coming. We serve a God who has an abundance of supply so wait on Him because your portion is coming. 

Listening is loving...


  1. it definitely is a series of events.....good read

  2. Unlike other challenges of life, break up happens gradually through a range of stages. Shock, denial, depression and some steps like these. Though the ending seems to be inevitable, the success is to close the chapter for good. The way I succeeded following http://lovesagame.com/stages/