Without Trust Your Relationship is Dysfunctional

Trust is one of the most important ingredient in a relationship. I mean there is love and respect and all that other good stuff but when you lose trust in any relationship it's doomed. If someone betrays you, you don't stop loving them overnight but trusting them becomes a thing of the past.



The thing about trusting someone is that you put yourself out there and you believe that they have your back. So when you realize that they don't got your back it's like someone literally pulled the rug out from under you. You feel foolish and stupid. You should be able to trust the people you love and that love you back. That's why words like enemies exist because you cant trust them!!! Isn't it ironical that you don't even have to hate a perceived enemy. You are just weary of them and you keep them at an arms length because the bottom line is, you can't trust them.

Anyhow, how many people can you say you trust infinitely? If they betrayed that trust how long do you think it would take to rebuild it. I think once the trust is breached there's really never recovering from it or it would take years to finally get past the feelings of resentment and hurt. In the words of Maya Angelou you may forget what a person did or said but you don't forget how they made you feel. You ask yourself why would this person do this when they know it would hurt me?

I think trust is the glue in any relationship. Whether it's a friendship or a marriage. I mean even at work there are people we trust within the work environment. Trust makes you vulnerable regardless of which type of relationship you are thinking about. I've been wondering whether I would stay with someone if they cheated on me? Would I stay friends with someone if they told things about me that were very private? Would I be able to move past it? Like I said it's not that you stop loving them, you just cannot rely on them to have your best interest.

I applaud people who are able to stay with people that have betrayed them in one way or the other but I wonder do you sleep with one eye open? Do you check their phones when they aren't looking? Do you tell them something and then think I hope this stays between us? You see my drift. It's so hard to go back to a normal relationship once one of you has breached that trust. Once bitten, you are twice shy. How much can you believe that the person has truly changed and will not hurt you again?

Have you been hurt by someone who broke your trust? What did you do? Is it bye see you later don't let the door hit you or did you work it out? How does working it out look for you. I'll say, I am not able to just move on. I may stay friends with you but it will never be the same because I'm weary of you. As for the boyfriend that's always a work in progress. You get to know a person slowly before you can gauge how much you can trust them. Saying 'yes' to someone means that you trust them infinitely beyond a shadow of doubt and that takes guts.

Listening is loving....

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